Self-Vision

Renee Matthews-Jackson © 2004

Did he buy her diamonds?
How about a string of fine pearls?
Was there a fox fur for Christmas?
Or even that pretty black dress she adored?

The aroma of Cierra adorned her neck,
maybe every three years or so...
It was his finest gift,
and he reminded her over and over to wear it.

He was a nice guy!
That's the way his friends viewed him.
But to her, nice never hugged gently.
It never told her she was gorgeous.
Wouldn't warm her like a soft comforter.

He was even faithful,
Godly, she confessed.
Wonder what Our Father
thought of his being one way
in church and still another at home?

She had become familiar with loneliness.
The lack of conversation wasn't new.
Arguments when they conversed was the norm.
She had no more reason to weep.
The tears dried up
after hurt filled oceans spilled over.

Fear left when reality came.
She still has vivid dreams and imaginations.
He is not visible in them these days.
Now the man she sees when eyes shut (and open)
has no face, no form, is void of life...

Yet her dream-like man stands firm in her hopes,
her conquests still live.
The man she once knew has vanished,
and her new vision believes enough in self
to make all her dreams come true.

At The Ebb of Thinking

Renee Matthews-Jackson © 2004

The river flows to and fro
returns to where it began.
A continuous cycle, reinventing itself,
known to every man.

But, do the waters change
or simply remain the same?
Is it as those who understand
stake the greater claim?

In my minuscule estimation
nothing new has ever evolved.
For me, the waves replenish themselves,
yet mysteries go unsolved.

Who can prove the other wrong
in theory and not fact,
or paint a rippled picture
in colorful abstract?

And if torrential winds do blow,
from which way drives the wind,
If hurricanes chased by cyclones
hurried around the bend?

Undetermined factors
allude the most intelligent.
Making sense of nonsense
when all else is irrelevant.

Now, if I dip into this river,
will I ever dip once more?
Will I return my spirit
to this sandy shore?

The beach will change,
waters elapse into something new,
and I will be last after first
while making my debut.

Do not be dismayed
by the riddle or the rhyme.
This is my normal mindset,
I think this way all the time.

Compelling is my neurology,
rivers flow inside my head.
I've used up nearly the whole spool,
and now hang by a short thread.

So, fool me not with vain philosophy.
Entice no more my mind,
I am not at all surprised
with anything amazing I find.

Extended Journey~Villanelle

Renee Matthews-Jackson © 2004

When echoes reach to say a last goodbye
Where limit bears its final scene
One step with a sparkle in my eye

Please note for me, that in all I bid try
And more so, did I tend to lean
When echoes reach to say a last goodbye

Often times life danced while kissing the sky
Verdant realities in hues so green
One step with a sparkle in my eye

There will be no tears shed, no one should cry
For now my sight is crisp and clean
When echoes reach to say a last goodbye

The grave does not really hold those who die
Extended journey of what I've seen
One step with a sparkle in my eye

It is hard to question the reasons why
Those who have faith know what I mean
When echoes reach to say a last goodbye
One step with a sparkle in my eye

Uncovered ~Triolet~

Renee Matthews-Jackson © 2004